Tomorrow is Another...What?

Not sure how many times there was oral regergatation during or after a meal I have prepared but speaking of spewing, I do recall the time I tried to add alphalpha sprouts to the family pancakes and what laughter I produced then. then there was the time with my first husband and the shroom and peanutbutter sandwhiches washed down with grape juice. This became inspiring artwork on the bathroom wall when it ignited my gastritis and I threw it all up before diving into a puddle of puppies TO PREVENT HAVING WHAT i THOUGHT FELT LIKE IT MIGHT BE A HEART ATTACK. No, I later went to bed with my husband and he held me down all night while I kicked, screamed and farted, in that order, repeTEADLY, ALL NIGHT LONG. tHEN THERE WAS THE INFAMOUS homemade granola bars I attempted to make for my friends when they came over. The minute they reached our bellies, there were four people trying to crap or throw up in our tiny little bathroom. College, eat your heart out. I nearly killed us all with a recipe of nothing but sweeteners, syrups and sugars with a little oatmeal tossed in.